Internet Challenge #17

Answer the questions posed by commenters here.

Currently there are five questions, but if more questions come through that aren’t obviously an attempt at rigging the system, you can answer them as well for more pointage.

1 IC point for each reasonably lucid answer (each person limited to one answer per question). Quote the question and leave your response to it in a comment on this post.

First person to answer one of the questions gets an extra IC point.

There can be more than one correct answer, so please feel free to tackle a question that has already been addressed.

UPDATE:

6 IC points for Bubs!
5 IC points for Jin!
5 IC points for Chef Cthulhu!

Another IC point for Bubs/Jin/Chef Cthulhu!

5 IC points for Flannery!

8 thoughts on “Internet Challenge #17”

  1. “What is the secret to the universe?”

    –What is the sound of a dwarf cursing the tide?

    “Is it?”

    –Most assuredly, it is. And it is not.

    “Have you ever been drafted?”

    –No, I volunteered, but I never amounted to much.

    “Whatever happened to all this season’s losers of the year?”

    –They are listening to your Kiss albums, getting questionable stains on the sofa, and probably smoking your best weed.

    “Is there anyone who is a bigger jerk than Gene Simmons?”

    –In a word, no.

  2. “What is the secret to the universe?”

    Keep blogging & you are sure to find out.

    “Is it?”

    On good days it certainly is; on bad days never.

    “Have you ever been drafted?”

    No, my cleavage would throw my aim off in battle.”

    “Whatever happened to all this season’s losers of the year?”

    I think they’ll try running again in 4 more years.

    “Is there anyone who is a bigger jerk than Gene Simmons?”

    Technically no, yet the peeps that watch his TV show might come close.

  3. “What is the secret to the universe?”
    > Ball bearings. It’s all ball bearings these days.

    “Is it?”
    > That that is, is. That that is not, is not.

    “Have you ever been drafted?”
    > No. 19 years (and counting) in the Armed Forces has made me too old, fat and stupid for the draft.

    “Whatever happened to all this seasons’ losers of the year?”
    > They’re trying to adopp Malawian kids.

    “Is there anyone who is a bigger jerk than Gene Simmons?”
    > No, but enablers (like Donald Trump) who put him on TV are technically equal in jerkitude.

  4. “Why can I remember the bassist’s name in Mötley Crüe, who I don’t even like, but not how to do calculus?”
    > Because your memory always prioritizes the important things.

  5. “Why can I remember the bassist’s name in Mötley Crüe, who I don’t even like, but not how to do calculus?”

    Because one day, your useless knowledge will win you millions of dollars on some shitty game show.

  6. “Why can I remember the bassist’s name in Mötley Crüe, who I don’t even like, but not how to do calculus?”

    Dude, because calculus doesn’t rock

  7. “What’s the secret to the universe?”

    –Duct tape.

    “Is It?”

    –Grapefruit.

    “Have you ever been drafted?”

    –No, but my friends have. I just went to Canada.

    “Whatever happened to all this season’s losers of the year?”

    –It’s not my turn to keep track of them.

    “Is there anyone who is a bigger jerk than Gene Simmons?”

    –Yes: John Mayer

  8. “Why can I remember the bassist’s name in Mötley Crüe, who I don’t even like, but not how to do calculus?”

    –You’re a victim of the popular culture war on academia

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