word fun

Screw Punctuation "Rules".

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According to The Blue Book of Grammar and Education:

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Rule 1: Periods and commas always go inside quotation marks, even inside single quotes.

Examples:
The sign changed from “Walk,” to “Don’t Walk,” to “Walk” again within 30 seconds.
She said, “Hurry up.”
She said, “He said, ‘Hurry up.'”

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First off, it’s nice to see the Blue Book people finally branch out from the used car market.

Secondly, I have been aware of this rule for a long time, but I just can’t stomach it in certain circumstances.

He said, “Have a nice day.”

Okay, the above sentence makes sense — I don’t mind having the period inside the quote.

The problem, however, was his definition of “nice.”

Agh! I hate it! Why is that period in the quote? The quotation marks are acting on the word! Not the sentence! Punctuation, get out of my quotes!

The problem, however, was his definition of “nice”.

Ah, my rage is receding.

I’m just announcing here, that I am not abiding by this rule foisted upon us by unaccountable grammarians!

Screw you, “jerks”!

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Dynamic IP Addresses and Wikipedia

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Had kind of an interesting thing happen to me when I was visiting Wikipedia earlier today.

I actually have an account there (used it once to correct the glaring, horrible error that the Lizard first appeared in Amazing Spider-Man #6, *not* #7!).

Despite the fact that I have an account there, when I visit the site I am never logged in.

So, imagine my surprise when I see that there is a message waiting for me.

I click on the message. The message was intended for the IP address I am currently using.

Now, realize that most Internet users don’t have “static” IP addresses. Your Internet Service Provider (ISP) usually has a bunch of IP addresses reserved for their use. When you connect to the Internet, your ISP will just assign you an IP address at random. This is often referred to as a “dynamic” IP.

From time to time (I’m not exactly sure what prompts this), your IP address will switch.

Wikipedia allows editing by members of their site, but it also allows edits anonymously. Instead of logging your ID when you edit a page, it logs your IP address.

Apparently the miscreant who last had my dynamic IP address had a little fun with the Lincoln-Way East High School page.

I just want to go on record that I would have spelled it “douchebag” not “doochbag”.

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Bad Dream Firing On All Cylinders

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I guess if you have a nightmare, you might as well cover all your bases.

Last night was one of those glorious dreams.

1. I was wandering around at college, after having gone back to school to start a new career. But, I didn’t know what I was supposed to be doing there.
2. A relative of mine got shot and lay on the ground, all bloodied.
3. I tried to help this relative, then realized I had traveled from the future and was in danger of meeting myself, creating a time paradox.

awards, blogging about blogging

Splotchy Considers An Award

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Here are some award ideas I am bandying about, inspired by the Thinking Blogger awards.

“Stinks At Frogger”
“Ball Hogger”
“Testicle Flogger”
“Asshole Jogger”
“Unscrupulous Snogger”
“Window Defogger”
“What’s An Augur?”

These awards will be handed out without concern for content, style, or correct spelling/grammar/punctuation.

To receive one of the above awards, I only ask that if you some day meet me in person, that you address me as Sir Thaddeus Wifflestein.

word fun

I Sometimes Heart The British English Language

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Just a short list of things I adore about the Brits and their language ways.

1. color = colour
2. elevator = lift
3. “Bangers and mash”
4. “Sticky wicket”
5. “Cheers” as an informal greeting

And things I don’t like:

1. cookie = biscuit
2. fries = chips
3. “git”
4. “shagging”
5. Any British turn-of-phrase that was popularized by the Austin Powers movies.

identify this song

Help Tanya Espanya ID a Song

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Just so this doesn’t remain buried in a comment, fellow blogger Tanya Espanya needs you.

As of now, no sound sample of Tanya humming or singing has been provided.

Here’s the info she does have for you to go on:

What about that “I Love New York” from the 1970s? I can’t find it anywhere and it’s not that one by some clown Steve Karmen.

Anyone? Just me then?

I love New York…what a great sensation…(Or something like that…I don’t know…I was 7.)

I spent some time trying to figure this one out, but (obviously) failed.

Won’t you please help?

arcade games, sound quiz

Arcade Quiz (He’s Got A Gun!)

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All of these games share a common theme.

They all have protagonists which take care of business the American way, with a gun.

I’ll give you the year the game came out, Fellow Travelers Of The Internet.

Gun 1 (1980)
I didn’t realize how many chunks of silence there were in this game. This game has some harsh, unfriendly sounds. And that smiley face bouncing towards you? That’s the grinning maw of death.

Gun 2 (1981)
This game might be a tough one to identify. You might have even forgotten that this game existed, but when you see it hopefully you’ll have an “a-ha” moment. If not, you might want to contemplate what you are using those brain cells for, anyway.

Gun 3 (1983)
Here it is, my all-time favorite game. Full disclosure — you don’t just have a gun at your disposal to eliminate your enemies. You can also kill them by jumping on them with your ass.

Gun 4 (1986)
This is another very fun game, one which I suck at, and wish I was just a wee bit better. It’s really fast-paced, and has a lot of energy and excitement. Well, within the world of mid-80’s videogames it has a lot of energy and excitement, at least.

Gun 5 (1988)
I was kind of leaving videogames at this point for the magical world of reality, but I did play this a little, mostly because the graphics were kind of advanced for the times. Here’s a hint — two (count ’em, two!) people mention the name of the game in this sound snippet.

Are these quizzes over yet? I thought we were almost finished.

UPDATE: Answers are now available here.