{"id":1766,"date":"2007-06-23T04:31:00","date_gmt":"2007-06-23T04:31:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/isplotchy.com\/blog\/?p=1766"},"modified":"2013-05-04T01:50:57","modified_gmt":"2013-05-04T01:50:57","slug":"a-hopefully-obvious-shopping-faux-pas","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/isplotchy.com\/blog\/2007\/06\/a-hopefully-obvious-shopping-faux-pas\/","title":{"rendered":"A Hopefully Obvious Shopping Faux Pas"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/isplotchy.com\/images\/blog\/target.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/isplotchy.com\/images\/blog\/target.jpg\" border=\"0\" alt=\"\"><\/a>I can safely say, that without doing even the slightest bit of research, the Internet contains the following advice from at least a handful of people:<\/p>\n<p><span>If you&#8217;re shopping at Target, don&#8217;t wear a red shirt.<span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n<p>Now, I realize that not everyone has a connection to the Internet, but surely these sage words have also been transmitted through our culture&#8217;s rich and vibrant oral tradition.<\/p>\n<p>Yet still, when I visit our local Super Target, which one would assume is only populated by superintelligent supershoppers, I swear that half the customers are wearing red.<\/p>\n<p>To these people, I implore you:<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/isplotchy.com\/images\/blog\/stopsign.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/isplotchy.com\/images\/blog\/stopsign.jpg\" border=\"0\" alt=\"\"><\/a><span>Note:<\/span> There is one exception to this rule.  If you intentionally wear red so you can hover around a busy aisle, sporadically adjusting items on their shelves and looking somewhat busy, for the sole purpose of saying, &#8220;I don&#8217;t work here&#8221; when shoppers come to you asking for help, by all means wear red.<\/p>\n<p>Asshole.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I can safely say, that without doing even the slightest bit of research, the Internet contains the following advice from at least a handful of people: If you&#8217;re shopping at Target, don&#8217;t wear a red shirt. Now, I realize that not everyone has a connection to the Internet, but surely these sage words have also &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/isplotchy.com\/blog\/2007\/06\/a-hopefully-obvious-shopping-faux-pas\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">A Hopefully Obvious Shopping Faux Pas<\/span> <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"episode_type":"","audio_file":"","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"","filesize":"","filesize_raw":"","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[220],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1766","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-shopping"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>A Hopefully Obvious Shopping Faux Pas - SPLOTCHY<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/isplotchy.com\/blog\/2007\/06\/a-hopefully-obvious-shopping-faux-pas\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"A Hopefully Obvious Shopping Faux Pas - SPLOTCHY\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I can safely say, that without doing even the slightest bit of research, the Internet contains the following advice from at least a handful of people: If you&#8217;re shopping at Target, don&#8217;t wear a red shirt. 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