{"id":1920,"date":"2007-02-15T04:48:00","date_gmt":"2007-02-15T04:48:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/isplotchy.com\/blog\/?p=1920"},"modified":"2013-05-04T01:52:21","modified_gmt":"2013-05-04T01:52:21","slug":"the-beast-of-berwyn-page-12","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/isplotchy.com\/blog\/2007\/02\/the-beast-of-berwyn-page-12\/","title":{"rendered":"The Beast Of Berwyn, Page 12"},"content":{"rendered":"

the continuing saga of …
THE BEAST OF BERWYN<\/a><\/p>\n

“Bill, you get my laptop. It’s downstairs under my framed Nagel print. I’ll hide the clown.”<\/p>\n

“Okay!” Bill rushes downstairs.<\/p>\n

As you put your back into pushing the crumpled remains of Officer Bozo into your spacious European oven, you stop for a second. Is this what famed blogger Arny Crankowicz has come to? How can he blog about this experience in good conscience?<\/p>\n

You reach for the phone and dial. “Officer Bubs, please.”<\/p>\n

“One moment.”<\/p>\n

A few seconds of dead phone silence pass.<\/p>\n

“Bubs here.”<\/p>\n

“Officer Bubs, it’s Mr. Crankowicz. There’s a dead body in my house. I don’t know how or why it got here.”<\/p>\n

“Stay put! I’ll be over there right away.”<\/p>\n

You hang up the phone. Bill emerges from the basement, laptop in hand. “Is this it?”<\/p>\n

“Thanks, Bill! Finally. I don’t even know if the last post I submitted made it to my faithful readers.” <\/p>\n

You walk toward him as he holds the laptop out to you. Suddenly, the immistakable scent of the ocean fills your nostrils.<\/p>\n

“That’s a lovely scent, Bill. What is it?” you ask.<\/p>\n

“Aramis,” Bill replies.<\/p>\n

“But Aramis doesn’t have a sea…”<\/p>\n

Bill’s face twists into a mask of fury. He lifts the laptop and brings it down on your head, as you fall into darkness.<\/p>\n

…<\/p>\n

You wake up, dazed and woozy, with a big bump on the head.<\/p>\n

Bubs sits next to you, typing on your laptop.<\/p>\n

Bubs states, “Be just a sec. Updating my blog.”<\/p>\n

Do you…<\/p>\n

1) Let Bubs finish<\/a>
2) Grab your laptop and check on your own blog<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

the continuing saga of … THE BEAST OF BERWYN “Bill, you get my laptop. It’s downstairs under my framed Nagel print. I’ll hide the clown.” “Okay!” Bill rushes downstairs. As you put your back into pushing the crumpled remains of Officer Bozo into your spacious European oven, you stop for a second. Is this what … Continue reading The Beast Of Berwyn, Page 12<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"episode_type":"","audio_file":"","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"","filesize":"","filesize_raw":"","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[346],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1920","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-beast-of-berwyn"],"yoast_head":"\nThe Beast Of Berwyn, Page 12 - SPLOTCHY<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/isplotchy.com\/blog\/2007\/02\/the-beast-of-berwyn-page-12\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The Beast Of Berwyn, Page 12 - SPLOTCHY\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"the continuing saga of … THE BEAST OF BERWYN “Bill, you get my laptop. 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