{"id":4335,"date":"2013-05-28T23:40:07","date_gmt":"2013-05-29T04:40:07","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/isplotchy.com\/blog\/?p=4335"},"modified":"2013-05-28T23:40:07","modified_gmt":"2013-05-29T04:40:07","slug":"camera-flashes-and-nighttime-dogwalking","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/isplotchy.com\/blog\/2013\/05\/camera-flashes-and-nighttime-dogwalking\/","title":{"rendered":"Camera Flashes and Nighttime Dogwalking"},"content":{"rendered":"

Confession. \u00a0For the past several months I had my dog Ollie do his business in the back yard. \u00a0Every few days I would walk through the grass with a claw-mechanism pooper scooper and a\u00a0bucket double-lined with plastic bags to collect and dispose of all his piles of earthly delight.<\/p>\n

However, partially due to a dumbass bird situation<\/a>, and partially because we are trying to get some grass to grow on a large hunk of the yard, I’ve been taking Ollie for walks. \u00a0 I used to take him for nighttime walks at ShesAllWrite’s place in Chicago. \u00a0Her old neighborhood, though a tad on the dicey side, was well-lit by sodium vapor streetlights. \u00a0It’s a lot darker in my neighborhood.<\/p>\n

Tonight, ShesAllWrite and I took Ollie for a walk, and he did his business. \u00a0I honestly wasn’t looking SUPER closely at where he dropped his doody. \u00a0Being a good neighbor, I had about seventeen plastic grocery bags stuffed in the lower-left pocket of my camo cargo shorts. \u00a0But I didn’t know exactly where the stuff I had to pick up was.<\/p>\n

I tried shining the display of my phone in the general direction of where the package had been dropped, but couldn’t find it. \u00a0The grass was glistening from a recent rain, which made finding a shiny piece of poo that much more difficult. \u00a0I gingerly walked in the grass. \u00a0“Be careful,” \u00a0ShesAllWrite warned.<\/p>\n

The scent of the doody gradually wafted up and into my nostrils. Oh, yes. \u00a0I was close.<\/p>\n

I got the idea to use my smartphone camera’s flash to find what I was searching for. \u00a0After several pictures, EUREKA! \u00a0Land, ho! \u00a0Mr. Watson! \u00a0Come here! \u00a0I need you!<\/p>\n

I bagged the crap and threw it in the trash. \u00a0I got home, plugged in my phone, and began to pull down my photos of the day. \u00a0The last pictures were the ones I had taken to locate Ollie’s leavings. \u00a0So, of course I made an animated GIF of the pictures. \u00a0You’re welcome!<\/p>\n

\"Dog
Dog poop. It’s in there somewhere.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Confession. \u00a0For the past several months I had my dog Ollie do his business in the back yard. \u00a0Every few days I would walk through the grass with a claw-mechanism pooper scooper and a\u00a0bucket double-lined with plastic bags to collect and dispose of all his piles of earthly delight. However, partially due to a dumbass … Continue reading Camera Flashes and Nighttime Dogwalking<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"episode_type":"","audio_file":"","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"","filesize":"","filesize_raw":"","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[427],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4335","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-home"],"yoast_head":"\nCamera Flashes and Nighttime Dogwalking - SPLOTCHY<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Adventures in Dogwalking. 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