{"id":486,"date":"2009-03-09T16:06:00","date_gmt":"2009-03-09T16:06:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/isplotchy.com\/blog\/?p=486"},"modified":"2013-05-04T01:36:38","modified_gmt":"2013-05-04T01:36:38","slug":"motherfuckin-mattress-giant","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/isplotchy.com\/blog\/2009\/03\/motherfuckin-mattress-giant\/","title":{"rendered":"Motherfuckin’ Mattress Giant"},"content":{"rendered":"

In times of great stress, I sometimes turn to profanity.<\/p>\n

A while ago, I made the jingle to Mattress Giant better by adding some colorful language:<\/p>\n

Look for my modifications in brackets. You’ll just have to imagine me swearing, as the original jingle has not been altered in the above clip.<\/p>\n

When you’re looking for that ooh-ahh feel,
[Motherfuckin’] Mattress Giant
When you want that ooh-ahh deal,
We’ve got the best price
For that ooh-ahh bed [Motherfuckers],
It’s only at Mattress Giant
Ooh-ahh [motherfucker]
Ooh-ahh [motherfucker]
Only at Mattress Giant, Ooh-ahh
Only at Mattress Giant, Ooh-ahh <\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

In times of great stress, I sometimes turn to profanity. A while ago, I made the jingle to Mattress Giant better by adding some colorful language: Look for my modifications in brackets. You’ll just have to imagine me swearing, as the original jingle has not been altered in the above clip. When you’re looking for … Continue reading Motherfuckin’ Mattress Giant<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"episode_type":"","audio_file":"","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"","filesize":"","filesize_raw":"","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[85,4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-486","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-swearing","category-who-doesnt-love-posts-about-advertising"],"yoast_head":"\nMotherfuckin' Mattress Giant - SPLOTCHY<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/isplotchy.com\/blog\/2009\/03\/motherfuckin-mattress-giant\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Motherfuckin' Mattress Giant - SPLOTCHY\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"In times of great stress, I sometimes turn to profanity. 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